Saturday, June 9, 2012

Krazy Kaption Kompetition!

Or, the KKK as it is also known.

Here's a photo to gladden many hearts as every surviving pre-RTD Doctor gathers in one place, one time, and most important of all of their own free will.

Just one question.

What the hell did Sylvester McCoy just say that freaked the others out to that degree?! Peter Davison looks like he wants to call the police, Paul McGann is clearly considering running for it while the Bakers seem to have been stunned into silence by what they've heard.




"...when you think about it, Gan must be a sex killer..."

"The reason why we were never invited back to that pool after Paradise Towers was simple: they took a very dim view of pool orgies. All the Kangs were up for it except that lassie who played Drinking Fountain, but that Clive Merrison's an adventurous lover, isn't he? Did I tell you what happened when Bonnie did the striptease?"

"The problem with Mugabe was that he never went far enough."

"...I didn't know Eccleston was going to quit when I posted it!"

"I admit it! I'M SMALL! I'M FIVE FOOT NOTHING AND I SLOUCH IN MY CHAIR! BUT I'VE HAD MORE WOMEN THAN THE REST OF YOU PUT TOGETHER! I'VE HAD HALF OF FUCKING SCUNTHORPE!!"

"I think the Big Finish Season 27 is canon."

"...and I've never walked properly since."

"...yes, the voices have been telling me to kill for quite a while now..."

"Apparently, old JNT was a whoopsie! I had no idea! Did you?"

"Paul may have got the kissing scenes in the movie, but I got the raping-the-gangleader-up-against-the-TARDIS-at-knifepoint-scenes!"

"Oh, all right. "Gottleageer. Gottleageer." You happy now?"

"No, Big Finish don't have any incriminating photos of me at all. I'm genuinely here by choice."

"...and I turned around and all the circus midgets were they wearing eyepatches!"

"Tom mentioned he tried to cheer Nick up in that hospice. I did something similar, but it involved a bedpan."

"CLEVERBOT STOLE MY BRAIN!"

"I know I may be in the minority here today, but I don't see why we need a 'Doctor Who Anonymous' twelve-step recovery program..."

"The End of Time should have had another episode, a whole episode of Tennant moping."

"Of course, not many people know that I was the original Lassie."

"...and that concludes my explanation for what the fuck was happening in Ghost Light."

"Nigel Verkoff's a nice decent chap, isn't he?"

"I never wore a hat. It was just a kind of fungal growth in my hair that turned into this giant, hat-like mushroom. It's very tasty. Would anyone like one?"

"Tom. Good though your sleight-of-hand is, this trick would work better if I was wearing a bra."
"But you are."
"Oh. I hoped you hadn't noticed."

"...yes, it was a total coincidence all your wives happened to mysteriously take yesterday off, the same day I myself was mysteriously unable to attend. It was a very mysterious day full of mysterious coincidences. And I definitely didn't bonk all your missus, no sir, no way..."

"I thought Death Comes to Time was rather good."

"I thought the Star Wars prequels were rather good."

"I thought GLC: The Carnage Continues was rather good."

"I liked that book sequel to Blade Runner, what was it called? It was brilliant."

"Those were my underpants. I'm so, so sorry."

"Mike Tyson? Pfft. Lightweight."

"You fuckers got confused by Donnie Darko? What a bunch of fucking r-tards!"

"How did Kyron Mallet find out where my room was? Why didn't any of you hear my screams?!"

"Why is it I always have to be the one who has to be the celebrity head? Oh, very well. It's either Michael Keating or Tony Robinson."

"Ricky Gervais is a genius. I want to have his babies. And then drown them."

"I don't know about you, but I'M submitting a story for that Blake's 7 writer's competition."
"WHAT?!?"
"Oh, didn't I mention it earlier? You four had best get writing..."

"...she's a dirty girl with a, a bad habit, a bad habit for drugs..."

"I have achieved enlightenment. These hands... can now kill."

"I don't want to panic you all, but someone's stealing our shoes and replacing them with those wierd rubber sandal things. They got me and they got Colin... and I think they've tampered with Tom's socks."
"No, no, no, old chap. I chose them myself. I adore pink!"

"...don't... blink..."

18 comments:

Miles Reid-Lobatto said...

"Ben Chatham's canon... didn't you know?"

To be honest, with his hat out in front of him on the floor, he looks like a sad old busking jazz man, ready to play to spoons to pay his way in life.

Youth of Australia said...

The irony, of course, is that he's a very happy and cheerful bloke who loves life and has lots of fun. Though he'd probably do the busking for the sheer hell of it.

I'm surprise I myself didn't do the BC gag. Maybe I'm growing as a person.

Miles Reid-Lobatto said...

Hooray! Personal Growth is always good. Let the Chatham go.

Now, a wandering busker type, that'd be an interesting character for the Doctor. We've had Cosmic Hobo, why not Cosmic Busker?

Maybe the Tom Waits incarnation of the Doctor.

Youth of Australia said...

Hooray! Personal Growth is always good. Let the Chatham go.
It'll be a lot easier if other people don't keep bringing him up, though.

Maybe the Tom Waits incarnation of the Doctor.
Maybe.

After all, doesn't Tom Waits get namechecked in the very first episode where he reveals he calls himself "John Smith"...?

Miles Reid-Lobatto said...

Okay, okay, I'll shut up about Chatham. It's not as if I assume a variaty of secret identities, sneak myself into the Chatham forum and proceed to do the Internet forum equivilant of running around naked shouting obscenities.

Youth of Australia said...

Okay, okay, I'll shut up about Chatham. It's not as if I assume a variaty of secret identities, sneak myself into the Chatham forum and proceed to do the Internet forum equivilant of running around naked shouting obscenities.

And you wonder why you get so tense.

Jared "No Nickname" Hansen said...

"I liked that book sequel to Blade Runner, what was it called? It was brilliant."

Lol. That's nearly cheating, you haven't read whatever that thing was called...


Maybe he's just pointing out that he and Colin go to the same shoe store?

Youth of Australia said...

Lol. That's nearly cheating, you haven't read whatever that thing was called...
No. But McCoy may have.

Maybe he's just pointing out that he and Colin go to the same shoe store?
This is also one of the options posted there.

Jared "No Nickname" Hansen said...

Damnit, I missed that one. Serves me right for trying to be halfway clever

Youth of Australia said...

It's been a long night.

Chris Hale gets married tomorrow.

Jared "No Nickname" Hansen said...

lol how gay of him.

I should have guessed somebody was getting married because the weather is awful..

Youth of Australia said...

You know what a jaded cynic I am, so when I say this was romantic, it put RTD to shame. Plus the Black Books fetishism, the celebrant accidently "outing" Chris as a downloader of TV shows...

The bridal waltz was replaced by Motorhead's Ace of Spades - which was not only hilarious but poignant, as that was the dance where they fell in love.

Dylan Moran! You cause more happiness than Tony Abbot ever has! This is a truth we should all acknowledge.

In short: best wedding ever.

Even Amy Pond's wasn't as good.

Jared "No Nickname" Hansen said...

Aww, that's nice, man. I hope they're happy together. It's funny because last time I met them she brought up marriage to embarrass him.

It was when I asked them how long they'd been dating...

"Five years" (beat) "And he hasn't even talked about marriage"

*Cue shocked expression*

It was really funny.

Youth of Australia said...

From what I heard today, marriage was a complicated thing as

a) he had been trying to propose to her for an age
b) she was aware of this and getting understandably impatient.

I would not consider it unreasonable that the new Mrs. Hale was thinking "Maybe I can break the ice with the flintlock-weilding blond adonis here at the convention...

Here's a funny thing: I knew Chris for as long as his beloved had.

Yet...
Chris: We're getting married!
Me: ...you have a girlfriend?!

Jared "No Nickname" Hansen said...

Lmao! I'd picked up on it by that stage. But I agree, they're a lot.. chummier than most couples.

That was an odd time we ran into each other at Newtown station actually, of all places.

Youth of Australia said...

Lmao! I'd picked up on it by that stage.
I think TREES had picked up on it by that stage...

But I agree, they're a lot.. chummier than most couples.
Yes. They are proper best friends as well as lovers. When your celebrant mentions how you do Basil Fawlty routines to your beloved... well...

That was an odd time we ran into each other at Newtown station actually, of all places.
They went there regularly, AFAIK. Oddly, by total coincidence, the local DWAS met at the same same time at the pub next to the station.

Other details I should mention:
When the "love honor obey" bit turned up in the vows, both of the happy couple pretended the microphone was broken. And so played with each other's hair instead.

...

Goddamn, I used to be butch!

Jared "No Nickname" Hansen said...

They went there regularly, AFAIK. Oddly, by total coincidence, the local DWAS met at the same same time at the pub next to the station.

Lol okay. So it was only odd because *I* was at that station for only one of two times in my life thus far...

Goddamn, I used to be butch!

You wanna talk about cars?

Youth of Australia said...

Anything to stop me sounding like a loser who cries at weddings, sure...

(Though the atmosphere was less "Princess Bride" and more "John Simm grooving like a psycho", I stress...)