It boggles the mind. Seriously.
You know, mid-90s, one of the best moments on Australian television was Doctor Who getting namechecked in Frontline by Mike Moore (no, not that one... or that one either...) in what was actually a joke about Moore's chronic out-of-touch-ness as he can't follow others' references to James Bond.
And yet, today, I boggle at the latest episode of Lowdown.
Guest starring my dad's mate Steve "Four Tits" Bisley, it concerned the main characters (a weak-willed journo, his overenthusiastic camera man and his flirty ex girlfriend) trying to get an exclusive interview about a radio host's public indecency in as quick a method as possible so they can catch Phantom of the Opera 2. Which is REAL, by the way. Alas, they fall foul of the host's slightly wierd wife who wants to sing at them.
The cameraman idly notes his five year plan is not as impressive as the journo's, admitting his plans involve "Tom Baker, the greatest Doctor Who of them all". This is treated with some horror from the others - but not because they don't like Doctor Who, but because camera dude had spent the first half of that conversation going on and on about his sexual frustration and the implication he was planning to seduce the T-Bone.
The camera dude's fan credentials were subtly hinted last week when - on a stealth undercover op, he uses a New Series Cyberman towel as a disguise, and later is tazered when his "lucky TARDIS" fails to keep him out of trouble.
Anyway, the episode putters along until - in between songs from the wife - the unlikely trio admire a wall of photos. "Look me in the eye and tell me that isn't Tom Baker," boggles camera dude, indicating one of them.
And it was. It actually bloody was a photo of Tom Baker and the wife snapped in mid-conversation.
I mean, even if it's some cunning photoshop trick, the idea of them ACTUALLY going to that much trouble boggles. My parents and I were dumbstruck, and when the incidental music started to become the distinctive sound of Ron Grainer, silence fell and damn well stayed there.
Despite the journo's let's-be-brutally-honest pathetic "not the Doctor Who thing, not now", the camera man is determined and confronts the wife with the immortal and awestruck:
"DOCTOR WHO AND THE INVASION OF TIME!!!!!"
Yes. Now, I'm not as big as an anorak as I could be. I do know that in said Invasion of Time, one of the female Shaboogans is played by an Aussie actress who reached a moderate amount of fame and is now usually spotted at the Melbourne Cup. I know that because by curious coincidence the ABC repeated Invasion of Time back in 2005 and the Guide noted we could see her twice that day at different ends of her career.
I honestly don't know if the wife in Lowdown was meant to be that actress, or actually WAS that actress, but is only slightly taken aback at the guy shouting Target titles at her. With a cheerful "Oh, are you a Doctor Who fan?" she leads him into a room and shows him something special.
She's got the Doctor's scarf.
And if it's not the genuine article it's a fucking good copy. Even the camera man is impressed - and that's before he confirms credentials by finding the hole sewn into the scarf, shakedly agreeing this is the same one used in Ark In Space and informing the audience that the hole represents the Ark's security systems trying to zap the Time Lord.
I don't know what the average viewer's reactions would be to that stunned mumbling of trivia, but I'm pretty certain every viewer's jaw dropped when the wife nodded and said,
"Yeah, he never made love without it."
The French Farce conclusion with a paranoid Bizley returning home and expecting to find his wife dead, but instead finds her in a broom closet with the Cameraman wearing only the Scarf, the Hat and the Coat (like that X-rated version of City of Death we always hear about).
And ... well... nope, I just boggle. It's comedy meant to evoke the same vibe as Bad Santa.
And yet, despite lacking all the smutty innuendo of "spending all week spanking Eccleston and then going back to Pertwee", or having a gay slut and his latest tomboy dressed in painfully accurate versions of the Sixth and Fourth Doctor's outfits while they bum some weed off a dealer, felt a lot more shocking than the first episode of Ideal shown on ABC2.
But maybe it's because automatic contenders for Australian comedy of the year, narrated by Geoffrey Rush and starring Kim Gyngel, just never seem the obvious place to see a guy shagging a woman twice his age while dressed as his childhood hero... at least when that childhood hero is Doctor Who.
I mean, if he'd been dressed as the last three Doctors, sure...
Sorry, I just needed to post in the hope someone else will confirm that YES, they DID see this as well.
Cause, seriously, I'm doubting the workings of my own brain at the moment.