Woo-hoo! The man who's incomprehensible stupidity and unreasoning hatred puts the likes of Lawrence Miles, Kyron Mallet and Sparacus himself to shame has finally updated his vitriol-dripping Saturday Teatime Guild website, the "constantly evolving" website that is so on-the-pulse its banner has the words "(almost) Totally bereft of references to Christopher Eccleston, David Tennant and Billie Piper. If you're 40-something and consider Russell T.Davies' version of your favourite show to be an abomination against all mankind, this site is for you. Enjoy."
And the ONLY addition to this site is the "Parallel Universes", where you can TASTE the bile and resentment as the meager couple of paragraphs devoted to the new series is forced to grow in time with its episode count. "73 episodes so far" it grudgingly mumbles, as if this doesn't mean the new series has racked up as many episodes as the last two "proper" Doctors put together!
Oh, the howlers GC has committed, friends. The years before he realized that Torchwood did not feature "Captain John Bannerman" and his squad of psychic detectives, or his rant that Freema Agyeman DARED to call herself anything other than "half-black". Not to mention the fact the only part of the new series he has actually seen was Time-Crash.
But what's worse than his insane refusal to so much as google what he's ranting about, or his patronizing view of people that dare to disagree with him, or the way he stole images from Charles Daniels' site... it is his gutless refusal to let anyone in any way contact him. Coward.
So what does GC have to say about the Eleventh Doctor?
With new Executive Producer Steven Moffatt forced to cast a new lead,
Suffering that horrible fate that five producers before have ALSO suffered with the integral part of the series - oh, poor Moff! And you only had over a year to prepare for it, you poor bastard you! JNT's suffering is nothing in comparison...
and choosing the virtually unknown Matt Smith
Virtually = even the AB frigging C could tell you what he was in. And so the hell what? Tom Baker was virtually unknown...
(looking like a cross between Edward Scissorhands, Marilyn Manson and a young Peter Davison)
...see? That's why GC's such an open-minded, objective sort of bloke. I like "young" Peter Davison, as if a three-year difference mattered... remember, Patrick Troughton was over TWELVE YEARS younger than Hartnell. The biggest age gap ever.
But what I am I saying. Matt Smith has wierd hair. Ergo: freak.
a new direction for the show was inevitable,
OK, pay attention to this bit.
and Moffatt immediately introduced the kind of inter-episode cross-linking that had been such a trademark of his Coupling sitcom.
Only someone who has watched neither Season Five nor Coupling could say things like that. "Inter-episode-cross-linking"? You mean the episodes cliffhanger into each other?!
Unfortunately, he was unable to resist the Davies-like grand finale,
So this is a new direction. But exactly like RTD.
And what is bad about a "grand finale"? Who the hell asks for a "weak finale"?!
bringing together all the major monsters and characters of the series for an action-packed two-part conclusion.
Notable that "all the major monsters and characters" appeared for about two minutes at the beginning and end of the first episode. It wasn't exactly The Stolen Earth, was it? But there I go again, mistaking GC for someone who has even the VAGUEST idea of what he's talking about.
Although a Christmas special is scheduled, it remains to be seen how much longer this vastly different version of Who will last.
I love how GC has been peddling those last seventeen words for OVER FIVE YEARS NOW. It's like a prayer. He said it before the show was made! He said it when Eccleston quit! He said it when Billie quit! He said it when Kylie Minogue dropped by! Yet 73 episodes and a clear BBC commitment for at least one more year EVERY TIME HE SAYS THIS clearly means nothing.
Still, points for admitting that the show is still being made. Well, assuming "scheduled" isn't GC-code for "well, they SAY they'll make one but they'll change their minds at the last minute oh yeah". And see how GC missed the return of the Silurians, River Song, even a little thing called... what was it now? Oh yeah, Amy Pond!
Given it is the SINGLE SOLITARY PART of his rubbishly-designed website he EVER updates and NEVER LETS ANYONE COMMENT, you think he MIGHT have some modicum of pride in his work.
Like me with photoshop for example...
...OK, bad example.