Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Good Will To All Trolls

I haven't mentioned sparacus in a while, as frankly his attempts to garner attention and controversy have gone from Luke Rattigan stamping his foot and screaming "I'M BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU!!" down to... well, we don't even have a name for that. His strategies to trigger flame wars range from claiming that Prince William and Kate Middleton are fantatical fans of Ben Chatham because they named their son George (no, don't follow the logic there) to his deranged Eleven Doctor story which was scientifically calculated to infuriate and annoy every right-minded Who fan in existence... alas, the fact the exact same story had been released by Big Finish several years ago under the title The Boy That Time Forgot has stopped that in its tracks. His forum is a ghost town where he's had to start talking to himself, while his blog (the place designed for you to talk to yourself) is gathering dust. The Chatham forum on GB has been destroyed and the followers have scattered to the four winds - even their affectionate attempts at Chathamnalia have gone.

But, as Paul McDermott noted, you can't keep a good man down - or even a mongrel like sparacus.

As the 50th anniversary of Doctor Who hurtles towards us in a blaze of advertising, radio specials, youtube vids that refuse to load, and the increasingly-valid-suspicion this might actually be good, sparacus has gone for trying to spark a flamewar on GB. After all, what's the point in unifying in this one-time celebration when we can be screaming abuse at each other and trying to king-hit and glass fellow fans?

It all started with this quote from David Tennant in the Radio Times, when he was asked if he found the decision to return to Doctor Who a tough one:

"No, not really. If the call comes to celebrate Doctor Who's 50th anniversary then it would (be) churlish to turn it down."

Sparacus reaction was slightly less subtle than Ricky Gervais impersonating John Cleese mentioning the war.

Another dig at Christopher Eccleston. First is was a comment at an awards ceremony asking Euros Lynn if he was happier working with him or Eccleston and now Eccleston is churlish. Its possibly a dig at Eccleston's working class roots. The word churlish comes from the anglo-saxon word coerl meaning a landless peasant.

Because, of course, David Tennant is well-known as being a vicious little passive aggressive bastard and his tendancy to mock the weak using archaic anglo-saxon terminology is one of his many unique vices. Why, his response to Dimensions in Time required a degree in medieval French even to translate, as well as a sound knowledge of Victorian legal terms discussing progeniture.

Just why would Tennant reserve this incredible spite for Eccleston, though?

Its because of their history. There was the comment to Euros Lynn. Also Eccleston landed the role of Jude in the film of Thomas Hardy's 'Jude the Obscure' wheras Tennant had to make do with a minor role. I know that many posters don't buy the argument that there is a rivalry and its all circumstantial evidence, but it does all add together to make a possibility.

Yes. For a five second scene, Tennant had to play an upper-class twit in a pub who made fun of Eccleston, who downed a pint and recited a poem that left Tennant looking like a total moron while Eccleston, broody and rite-of-passagey, left the pub the uncontested victor.

No wonder Tennant never forgave Eccles. He apparently sent flaming dog turds to Spike Milligan's house for that time Spike got the punchline in their scene in Taking Over The Asylum. It's also well known that Peter O'Toole dare not leave his house for fear that obscure anglo-saxon might be etched into his front lawn in weed killer. The entire marriage to Georgia Moffat was, of course, a cunning plan to keep her in the kitchen and off-screen where she might steal any limelight from Tennant - and the fact she's Davo's daughter is clearly a double whammy because Tennant never really got over Time-Crash.

And as for what he's did to Daniel Radcliffe, well, let's just say the fact his only other job has been to bugger a horse on stage is surely no coincidence?

I am well aware that many posters don't agree that there was a rivalry over Jude. However I'm just saying that it could be a possibility that is all. It was, I think I'm right in saying, Tennant's first role in a film but Eccleston was playing the lead. The latter received all the attention.

Yes. Because a life-long actor with huge respect in and out of the industry for his professionalism is still nursing a grudge that he didn't get the lead role in his first film. If only the audition tapes still existed, no doubt we would see Tennant going absolutely apeshit and smashing up the place with a baseball bat when he didn't get the role, swearing in fin de sicle Glaswegian until he was given a role specifically to look like a git and be embarrassed even further by Eccleston's character rather than the man himself.

I've no idea. Just look at it from Chris Eccleston & David Tennant's points of view. Tennant wants the role of the Doctor, yet Eccleston beats him to it. There must have been some jealousy on Tennant's part, I would be if someone grabbed my big part.

As ever, you can't argue with either plain facts or sub Carry On innuendo...

Then Eccleston loses the role due to reasons still not entirely clear and Tennant jumps in and grabs the role from him. There presumably must be a degree of resentment by Eccleston of Tennant.

I'm amazed spara hasn't made the obvious connection and realize that Eccles didn't quit - he went into witness protection because every day he found Tennant hiding in the changing room, doing the knife trick from Aliens with a sonic screwdriver and laughing "I am going to be the Doctor after you dieeeeee...."

I do not "hate DT". Not at all. I have no idea what the guy is like in real life. I do not like his portrayal of the Doctor or his Virgin media adverts but that it not the same as hating the man.

Now, given the Virgin media adverts were never actually screened this seems a bit bitchy. That's like me listing the reasons I hate Chris Lilley as a DVD extra I haven't seen... though, yeah, probably I do.

My point is that Eccleston, according to some theories posted on here (not by me) did not want to leave Doctor Who. Therefore he would surely feel some annoyance at Tennant grabbing his role. I also think Eccleston was better on the job as he had a more serious edge in his portrayal, despite the grinning.

Yes, as you can see, spara has literally climbed inside the psychological state of Eccleston despite admitting to have absolutely nothing to go on and ignoring various facts - like personal bereavement during Boomtown! - that may have warranted it. No doubt Eccleston also hates Smith, Hurt and Capaldi for also grabbing the role that was not theirs by right and being such a quiet, introverted and tow-the-line sort of guy, Eccles has remained totally silent for nine years about the whole thing.

David Tennant, however, apparently hires a singing telegram every week to arrive at Eccleston's door and insult him personally with a giant inflatable banana.

No I am not trolling. I am just speculating. I do not claim to be the font of all wisdom.

A personal idol of the Royal Family at Windsor, yes, but not the font of all wisdom.

Yet, in fairness to spara, he does NOT believe Olag Gan is a cat-strangling sex killer - so his grip on reality is five times stronger than Nala Snevets who is still reeling from the idea that Paul McGann actually played the Doctor, as PMG is too much of a wussy-no-fist-coward to ever do that...


Miles Reid-Lobatto said...

Wow... You ever get the feeling that WE'RE not the crazy ones in the fandom anymore?

I think Nala Snevets is just jealous that 'The Minster of Chance' was able to more mature than Kaldor City by simply being good, interesting, fun and for the most part, free. That had both McGann (playing Space-Tony Blair) and Paul Darrow playing... let's be honest, Paul Darrow.

Youth of Australia said...

Either that or just angry that BF has been canonized and it spends most of its time rendering every Magic Bullet production uncanon.

To misquote the IT Crowd:

"Where is your Fendahleen subtext NOW, priest?!"

Miles Reid-Lobatto said...

That too. Plus when BF does Blake's 7, it does sound mostly like Blake's 7... unlike Lucifer, which is straight up Magic Bullet's alley.

In the Nano-novel, a character called Kaston is about to kill a character called Chatham. This is completely unintentional. I just realised today that I hadn't continued my yearly Nanowrimo injoke and changed a character's name.

Youth of Australia said...

In fairness to Lucifer, it does seem that Darrow was trying to turn a James-Bond-pre-credit-action sequence into a novel. For a laugh.

It certainly wasn't pretentious.

Finished Prisoners of Time. Um, seriously, did no one ever outline the climax and think "Well, I'm sure everyone will be satisfied by that. It will definitely be worth the wait oh yes indeed."

That said, at least the artwork means the characters are recognizable this time round. I spent weeks last issue trying to recognize Harry Sullivan.

Miles Reid-Lobatto said...

Prisoners of Time went from up and down entertaining to basically the ultimate fix fic. So the 50th Anniversary comic for IDW is essentially... the redemption of that guy. IDW deserve to lose the license, the comics have been up and down, but this and screwing up the one chance for Dr. Who/Star Trek TNG crossover have shown they don't really get Dr. Who. A shame because a lot of their other comics such as The X-Files and My Little Pony are pretty good.

At least Harry is completely recognisable in this month's DWM comic.

Youth of Australia said...

And let's not forget the insult of the Donna once again being ignored in the "every companion ever" in favor for Kamelion and Adric.

And apparently seeing the Ponds again has absolutely no emotional weight for Eleven.

That said, Nine gets some good lines and Frobisher is awesome. He's been like the CIA in Miracle Day - better-qualified and more likable than the designated heroes.

And every Doctor went to Adam's funeral? Even Sixie? Not one of them went "Oh, the psycho loser did ONE nice thing at the end of his life and we're supposed to go all emo! A guy who actually trusted a bearded psycho called the Master to kindap and kill everyone we held dear?"

I like to think they were all at the cemetary so they could, one by one, piss on the grave.


Miles Reid-Lobatto said...

As the first live action Transformers movie oddly showed us, Transformers are capable of pissing on things, we just don't know why.

Youth of Australia said...

...I have nothing to say to that.

Except this from

"Big Finish is now canon... Tom, what does this mean for the DWADs? Can we maybe drop a few allusions to some Big Finish adventures?"


Miles Reid-Lobatto said...

Don't even try. Seriously, why are people so obsessed with making sure everything fits into neat and tidy little canononical boxes? You're writing stories about a universe where you can do anything, anywhere... don't limit youself.

Youth of Australia said...

Remember, these are the same people who insist that they know better than the entirety of BBC Wales.

Miles Reid-Lobatto said...

Well of course. They're not a homosexual from Wales, so therefore their scripts are better.

Youth of Australia said...

Amusingly they say

"Our policy still stands that if it isn't on the television, it didn't happen."

Well, that saves worrying if the DWADs are canon.