Sunday, March 22, 2009

Updated update

God it's getting difficult to get into Blogger nowadays, isn't it? Taken fifteen minutes and in that time the muse has completely left me goddamnit. I was thinking of a "If *I* Had Written The Lives and Loves of a She Devil" or something subversive like that since the real life inspiration for The Parking Ticket Legacy has dried up (Nigel makes three abusive emails and the matter is instantly resolved by some disturbingly nice local parliamentary reps). So, for want of something to say (I must do my Robin Hood 3 essay sometime though - damn muse, you see) I'll just piss about talking about spoofs.

For various reasons, I have to do complicated webhosting things so there'll be a cut off point - the main BFs from 2009-onwards, the 11th Doctor stories (should I be alive and writing then - oh, by the way RTD, when I said I wanted your lies about the gap year, I meant "have four stories over the year" rather than "might as well only have one story" - god, I'm racing through BFs, I tell ya. I'll never last till Christmas), 8th Doc stories starting with Orbis will be on a new website but easily findable from the old, if you get my drift.

Confused? I should say so!

Meantime, I've done

- Seven Keys to Doomsday
- Dalek Empire
- Dalek War
- Dalek Empire 3
- I, Davros
- Return of the Krotons

Since Charles Daniels is apparently on the war path I suppose I should really get on with Tenth Doctor stories, and I've sort of half done some of them. A bit. I was gunning myself up to finish the episodes before the ABC screened them again, but that plan was foiled when the repeats were curtailed.

Mighty Zarquon this is a boring post, isn't it? Did anyone see No Heroics? A kind of This Life meets Watchmen, though arguably with more cynacism and cruelty. No turquoise genitalia, though. Life's normally so much fairer, isn't it? And I'm beginning to wonder just how much music inspires RTD, having skim read his biography and - more importantly - looked for Rogue Traders lyrics for the Master to quote.

"Doctor?"
"Master?"
"It’s me. Changed my face, but kept my name, kept it though I play the game! Don’t you know they’re all the same? Don’t you know they’re all the same? And that’s the way to go!"
"How did you do it?"
"Wasn’t too difficult. Just had to drive fast, not crash; make my money, make it last; hang tight, kick back; prepare myself for the attack; buy low, sell high; take the pills, tell the lies; fake my tan, wear a tie; new life cycle, I’ll never die!"
"...right. You
sure you’re over the regeneration trauma?"

And I was going to really do my Robin Hood musings there. But it's too damn hot.

Life sucks sometimes.

21 comments:

Cameron Mason said...


And I'm beginning to wonder just how much music inspires RTD, having skim read his biography and - more importantly - looked for Rogue Traders lyrics for the Master to quote.


Having listened to the Ting Tings, I'm now reimagining that phone call in The Sound of Drums...


Master: Say my name, say my name bitch!

Doctor: Fine, Master.

Master: That's not my name! That's not my name!


Cameron

Cameron

Youth of Australia said...

Ah, but as I wrote in Dystopia...

"What’s ma name, ho?!"

"What?! I am not going to debase myself for you, ya chimp!"

"Tough shit!" the Bastard retorts, dances around the console. "Open up the engines, set everything to eleven! I ain’t played with one of these bitches in a long time!"

"Oh no, not this time, you utter bastard!" the Doctor shouts, fiddling with his sonic screwdrivers. "You can wipe out civilizations, trigger terrible wars, murder innocent cockroach girls but you do NOT, repeat NOT steal my fucking motor!!"


So it's been done in spirit if not in letter...

Didn't Spara do his own version of the convo, though?

Cameron Mason said...


Didn't Spara do his own version of the convo, though?


Yup.

It turned into phone sex, IIRC...

Cameron

Youth of Australia said...

Good grief, so it did.

Hear about Tennant's finale?

Didn't expect them to bring HER back...

Cameron Mason said...


Hear about Tennant's finale?

Didn't expect them to bring HER back...


Which her?

Her wot use to be a pop star?
Her wot's now in the law show?
Her wot use to be a comedienne?
or
Her wot also use to be a comedienne and is now married?

Cameron

Youth of Australia said...

Her wot named after two important TV folk and now published her amazingly incredible book "A Journal of Impossible Things" available at all good bookstores and that particularly crappy one at Maroubra Junction.

Cameron Mason said...


Her wot named after two important TV folk and now published her amazingly incredible book "A Journal of Impossible Things" available at all good bookstores and that particularly crappy one at Maroubra Junction.


Ah - Her wot also use to be a comedienne and is now married?

Why didn't you say so!

Cameron

Youth of Australia said...

Loose lips cost lives and all that bollocks...

Cameron Mason said...


Loose lips cost lives and all that bollocks...


So do you think she decided to profiteer from having her heart broken by an alien who regards her as a stupid ape?

Cameron

Youth of Australia said...

Having READ the badly-scribbled muck, if she was able to decipher it and turn it into something halfway approaching a narrative she clearly deserves the JKR-style notoriety she has obviously achieved...

Cameron Mason said...

"Who do I make this out to?"

"The real author, you plagiarising hussy!"

Cameron

Youth of Australia said...

"And how do you spell that?"

Cameron Mason said...

"D O C T O R."

Youth of Australia said...

"Ah.... SECURITY!"

*runs for it*

Cameron Mason said...

"Awww jings!"

*pulls out psychic paper*

"John Smith, book patrol. Nothing to see here..."

Cameron

Jared Hansen said...

I am very confused.



So what else is new?





HOLY SHIT, AN UPDATE!

Youth of Australia said...

Yeah, sorry about this. Best I can do. It's literally become difficult to blog of late.

Jared Hansen said...

Yeah, I can't talk. That was meant in jest but I realised just after I posted it that it sounded bitchy. Sozzle!

Youth of Australia said...

Well, it got me to post something new, so it can't have ALL been bad.

Jared Hansen said...

Bloody hell! Unfortunately I'm too tired to read the mass of text right now. If you're in the mood there's also a new post on my blog. It's bitchilicious.

Youth of Australia said...

...indeed it is...