Dear GOD! I tell you, I often cringe at how I've treated Sparacus in the knowledge that Gabriel Chase was out there all along. Once again, Spara, at the very least this guy deserved that crap more.
Gabriel Chase (the discerning Who fan) and his contact free website. It prides itself on not mentioning anything post McCoy. Except in the tiny "parallel universes" section for 'unreal Doctor Who' section which is, ironically, the only thing Chase can update.
The page has been reedited to turn RTD's Doctor Who into a single section (in order to make it look less interesting and significant) and the good howlers of Captain John Bannerman and the like are gone. But new stuff is there!
More an illegitimate second-cousin than a legitimate child. During a summer littered with endless reruns of the new series on BBC3 and UKTV Gold, word emerged that Freema Agyeman was to be farmed out to Torchwood
No, Spara did a riff on this too, so I don't need to discuss this further. However, while Spara hated the character of Martha, I don't think Chase has even seen an episode, so it is total sloppy research rather than bias. I'm not sure which is worse.
and replaced by Catherine Tate, presumably because Tate is more of a celeb than Agyeman.
???
Yes. More celeb = better. Which is why Agyeman replaced that nobody, Billie Piper.
Give me strength.
A second shock announcement followed, stating that the show wouldn't be run at all in 2009 owing to Tennant appearing in a theatrical run of Macbeth, something that would never have been done during the original series.
Now, even the most pessimistic and new series hating of fans would balk at that.
It's not 100% sure about whether Tennant asked for a year off or is simply making the best of an outside problem, but there will be three specials in 2009. And that doesn't include specials like Attack of the Graske or the Infinite Quest. It's a hell of a lot more than we got in 1990, isn't it?
If he can't be arsed reporting GENUINE facts, why bother updating the part of the site he isn't interested in? Is he desperate for something to do?
Are the cracks beginning to show?
What I love is that he left this sentence at the bottom after Doctor Who performed the horrifying transgression of adapting "Human Nature" (which, despite rendering the book series non canonical apparently ties the series to them - but did he say anything about "Blink"?) then edited in the snub about Martha, then edited in the 2009 issue.
Basically, how much news is he going to keep adding before "the cracks" actually "show"?
Gabriel Chase, you are a fool, a cad and a simpleton. And a coward too, since you refuse to let anyone contact you.
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Hmm, I have to say that these entries didn't quite do me for the usual Gabriel Chase "WTF is this loony on?!?" factor, so I checked out his website to see if there was anything really crazy on there.
After a couple of minutes...
In some [stories] the only females present are those the Doctor brought with him. Neither Mission to the Unknown or The Deadly Assassin featured any female characters. In one respect that is one of Doctor Who's little idiosyncracies - a reflection of society at large. The decision to take on Ace as Mel's replacement rather than the more traditional Ray was a conscious effort to re-align the show's political correctness, and undoubtedly caused the drop in its popularity.
(Emphasis added)
Now that is a completely insane thing to say on oh-so-many levels. It is of course from the 'sexist who' section of his site, in which he also topically suggests that those who write stories about matriarchal societies are S&M fetishists:
Drahvins:- all female, so presumably the males are sat at home being subservient. Or maybe it's just one of those Fifties-style role reversal scenarios that some male writers enjoy.
It's a good read. He disses traditional Who for being sexist, whilst writing in an astonishingly sexist manner. I hope it's not possible to OD on hypocrosy...
Oh, wait it gets better at the end!
But, just as the genders were being balanced, just as the females were beginning to be taken seriously, the ratings began to drop. Coincidence? Or is it just human nature for women to want to feel protected and for men to want to do the protecting?
And I thought Jon Blum read too much into the ratings...
Was Doctor Who's eventual demise caused by the PC squad sticking their collective noses in and upsetting the balance.
Ah, Chase. That damned PC squad seems to constantly follow him around...
Leela's outfits caused consternation amongst the dirty-minded hacks in Fleet Street but most male viewers preferred Sarah, who rarely showed her legs.
This really is a revelation to me. I had no idea I was 'a dirty-minded Fleet Street hack'...
or that most guys 'preferred' Sarah... they kept awfully quiet about it!
The death of a female character is disturbing (Katarina, Sara Kingdom, Madame Lamia), the death of a male character is quickly forgotten. Who mourned Adric's passing?
Yet more evidence that GC never visits OG.
The female companions stay fresh in the memory, the males slowly fade away. The most popular male companion was Jamie, who wore a skirt.
Hello Scotland!
The only British TV series to feature a female time-traveller disappeared after four episodes (Hands up if you remember Time Riders). Is that sexist? Or a reflection of reality?
Might be a reflection of YOUR reality, GC.
(Also, would Sapphire from S&S count as a 'female time traveler'? Never seen the show, as you know..)
Hmm, I have to say that these entries didn't quite do me for the usual Gabriel Chase "WTF is this loony on?!?" factor
Yeah, sorry, but I only have so much to work with. Which is the point, rather.
In some [stories] the only females present are those the Doctor brought with him. Neither Mission to the Unknown or The Deadly Assassin featured any female characters.
Ahem! Female alien delegates and that computer voice respectively, I think you'll find. And the TARDIS is a female, surely she counts?
The decision to take on Ace as Mel's replacement rather than the more traditional Ray was a conscious effort to re-align the show's political correctness, and undoubtedly caused the drop in its popularity.
...So, the show works better when it in no way whatsoever reflects social concerns?
BTW, I prefer Ray to Ace as a companion, but the idea that Ace caused the series to be axed is bullshit - and its decline in popularity had something to do with Eastenders being shown against it...
Now that is a completely insane thing to say on oh-so-many levels.
Yes. Not that we can complain to The Discerning Fan because he's too scared to be contacted.
It is of course from the 'sexist who' section of his site, in which he also topically suggests that those who write stories about matriarchal societies are S&M fetishists:
Drahvins:- all female, so presumably the males are sat at home being subservient.
Presumably?! He hasn't actually listened to the thing, then, has he? Where the male population is discussed at length in part one?
Or maybe it's just one of those Fifties-style role reversal scenarios that some male writers enjoy.
For fuck's sake, the male writer of Galaxy Four wrote an ALL-MALE Drahvin race. It was Verity Lambert, a self-confessed woman, who chose the role reversal.
JUST SHUT UP, GC! OR AT LEAST DO SOME FUCKING RESEARCH!
It's a good read. He disses traditional Who for being sexist, whilst writing in an astonishingly sexist manner. I hope it's not possible to OD on hypocrosy...
I fear GC would suffer an Incredible Hulk like transformation...
Oh, wait it gets better at the end!
Oh dear.
But, just as the genders were being balanced, just as the females were beginning to be taken seriously, the ratings began to drop. Coincidence?
...yes.
Or is it just human nature for women to want to feel protected and for men to want to do the protecting?
How do you explain RTD's series, then, smart arse? Oh wait, you can't! That's why it's in the Parallel Universe section!
Ah, Chase. That damned PC squad seems to constantly follow him around...
When they're not heckling Spara. Apparently it is illegal to watch Stones of Blood nowadays...
Leela's outfits caused consternation amongst the dirty-minded hacks in Fleet Street
Not really. Lalla Ward's Romana got more flak for her schoolgirl outfit than Leela ever did.
JUST DO SOME FUCKING RESEARCH!
but most male viewers preferred Sarah, who rarely showed her legs.
DUH! Remember, most male viewers were under ten at the time, and they didn't like the lady that kept stabbing people and making Dr Who cross!
This really is a revelation to me. I had no idea I was 'a dirty-minded Fleet Street hack'...
or that most guys 'preferred' Sarah... they kept awfully quiet about it!
Well of course. It's easier to admit fancying the chick in the leather bikini...
The death of a female character is disturbing (Katarina, Sara Kingdom, Madame Lamia), the death of a male character is quickly forgotten. Who mourned Adric's passing?
Fucking me for a fucking start! Sara and Katarina and Madame Lamia were never mentioned again! Adric was last talked about in Paul McGann's The Last, so up yours!
Yet more evidence that GC never visits OG.
I like to think he was banned.
The female companions stay fresh in the memory, the males slowly fade away.
Two words: Captain. Jack.
The most popular male companion was Jamie, who wore a skirt.
WTF?! You think if, say, Harry had dressed up in Rocky Horror garb, he would be more popular?!
The only British TV series to feature a female time-traveller disappeared after four episodes (Hands up if you remember Time Riders).
I do. And it lasted SIX episode you USELESS, STUPID FUCKER!
Is that sexist? Or a reflection of reality?
No, dipshit, the plot stated she didn't want to travel in time!
(Also, would Sapphire from S&S count as a 'female time traveler'? Never seen the show, as you know..)
Yeah, she's a female time traveler, though the series often stays in contemporary Earth (albeit covered in time rifts).
I must get you one of their stories, but at best all I can do is VHS...
BTW, I prefer Ray to Ace as a companion, but the idea that Ace caused the series to be axed is bullshit - and its decline in popularity had something to do with Eastenders being shown against it...
Oh, yeah, Ray out of those two for sure. Though I didn't like Ace much when I watched the show, I think it was the obviously-fake cockney accent that irritated me the most. (And yet I never had that problem with Billie Piper, so take THAT, haters!)
For fuck's sake, the male writer of Galaxy Four wrote an ALL-MALE Drahvin race. It was Verity Lambert, a self-confessed woman, who chose the role reversal.
Wow. I did not know that.
Verity Lambert really did do her best to make dull stories interesting, eh? (I was also thinking of her decision to ditch an entire episode of Planet of Giants... though I'd have preferred two.)
JUST DO SOME FUCKING RESEARCH!
If GC were to do that, he would risk someone telling him what to like. And that is a chance he can never, ever take.
DUH! Remember, most male viewers were under ten at the time, and they didn't like the lady that kept stabbing people and making Dr Who cross!
Lmao - so very, very true!
Fucking me for a fucking start! Sara and Katarina and Madame Lamia were never mentioned again! Adric was last talked about in Paul McGann's The Last, so up yours!
That's a very good point... when the Doctor talks about the times he 'failed' he never bemoans Katrina, does he? And Adric was the one who got the mass publicity for "first time ever a companion has been killed off"..
I like to think he was banned.
It's certainly difficult to imagine any other eventuality.
Two words: Captain. Jack.
Touche!
WTF?! You think if, say, Harry had dressed up in Rocky Horror garb, he would be more popular?!
Yeah, I thought the warped logic of that sentence spoke for itself.
traveler, though the series often stays in contemporary Earth (albeit covered in time rifts).
I must get you one of their stories, but at best all I can do is VHS...
VHS is as useful to me as heiroglyphics to Shakespeare.
Oh, yeah, Ray out of those two for sure. Though I didn't like Ace much when I watched the show, I think it was the obviously-fake cockney accent that irritated me the most. (And yet I never had that problem with Billie Piper, so take THAT, haters!)
Battlefield is a true nadir for both Ace and the Seventh Doctor. I got no defense for that.
Wow. I did not know that.
It's utterly true. There's a bit where Steven gets his ass whupped by Maaga, originally had Barbara getting smacked by Gar.
Verity Lambert really did do her best to make dull stories interesting, eh? (I was also thinking of her decision to ditch an entire episode of Planet of Giants... though I'd have preferred two.)
She did her best, but there was some kind of cult determined to get a shrunken TARDIS crew story to screen no matter what. I just love the fact the story about shrinking was shrunk! Like the doppleganger Androids of Tara itself being a copy, or State of Decay coming back from the Dead...
If GC were to do that, he would risk someone telling him what to like. And that is a chance he can never, ever take.
I wouldn't tell him what to like. Just what's truth.
"Tom Baker is the best" is opinion. "Tom Baker was very popular" is fact.
Lmao - so very, very true!
Thank yew.
That's a very good point... when the Doctor talks about the times he 'failed' he never bemoans Katrina, does he?
To be fair, she killed herself! It was entirely her choice and he was in no way to blame for it. If she had acted sensibly, the Doctor could have saved her.
Sara though, is a different matter, since she died because she went back to save him from the Daleks and refused to leave him.
And Adric was the one who got the mass publicity for "first time ever a companion has been killed off"..
He was the first one to have been in the show for more than six episodes and be killed off.
Touche!
Sorry. I meant "Captain John Bannerman"...
Yeah, I thought the warped logic of that sentence spoke for itself.
Mind you, I dare say Charles Daniels would have noticed him...
VHS is as useful to me as heiroglyphics to Shakespeare.
I don't suppose you could just buy them from the local HMV, then?
Battlefield is a true nadir for both Ace and the Seventh Doctor. I got no defense for that.
Nadir for the entire show, really - though it picks up in the last two eps.
Battlefield has been on my mind for a re-write... I mean, it has some great bits in it, but it somehow feels like every cool bit (like Mawgan giving the old woman the power of sight as a tip) is completely accidental on Aaronovitch's part and an inevitability considering the sheer amount of crap in the story. Plus the completely bewildering Asian clone of Ace simply HAS to go.
"And then what happened?"
"Boom!"
"Boom?"
"BOOOOOOM!"
*BOOM*
Ugh, it nearly makes my eyes water to even remember that...
She did her best, but there was some kind of cult determined to get a shrunken TARDIS crew story to screen no matter what.
It should never have happened!
I just love the fact the story about shrinking was shrunk! Like the doppleganger Androids of Tara itself being a copy, or State of Decay coming back from the Dead...
That's a lot of irony I never noticed..
To be fair, she killed herself! It was entirely her choice and he was in no way to blame for it. If she had acted sensibly, the Doctor could have saved her.
Sara though, is a different matter, since she died because she went back to save him from the Daleks and refused to leave him.
..yeah, I'm completely ignorant of just about all missing stories, save Power, Highlanders and [regrettably] Invasion.
Sorry. I meant "Captain John Bannerman"...
Somewhat lacking as a sci-fi hero name, isn't it?
I don't suppose you could just buy them from the local HMV, then?
Of course.
Though I'm prioritising finishing my Sharpe collection first, you understand.
The damned ABC store didn't have Sharpe's Gold though! That's the one Nigel Kneale wrote, despite having complete contempt for history, so Sharpe saves women from Aztec cultists in the middle of Spain! Bernard Cornwell, the creator, says that his jaw-dropped when he watched it. I HAVE to see it, ABC, I NEED TO SEE THE AWFULNESS!!!
Nadir for the entire show, really - though it picks up in the last two eps.
Thanks to the Brig, methinks.
Battlefield has been on my mind for a re-write...
Ironic, as it was redone five hundred times. DWM needed extra pages to cover the plot changes...
I mean, it has some great bits in it, but it somehow feels like every cool bit (like Mawgan giving the old woman the power of sight as a tip) is completely accidental on Aaronovitch's part and an inevitability considering the sheer amount of crap in the story.
Why give the old woman the power of sight... then remove the character from the plot? If, say, her sight was somehow part of the plot resolution, it'd help.
Plus the completely bewildering Asian clone of Ace simply HAS to go.
She was supposed to be a student with Warmsley, but that plot thread was so totally abandoned... I sometimes worry that Shui Young (it means Little Cloud) was some kind of replacement for Ace. Then I remember how awful Ace was in that adventure, and cheer her on in that bit where she reminds the audience of how many issues and how fucked up Ace is. "Even your parents hate your guts!"
Ugh, it nearly makes my eyes water to even remember that...
Me too. It stings. And the face Sophie Aldred's lisp created a better sound effect than the ACTUAL explosion... ouch.
It should never have happened!
I note that the rest of the season acts like Planet didn't happen, none of the cliffhangers lead into it or anything.
That's a lot of irony I never noticed..
I notice stuff like that a bit.
..yeah, I'm completely ignorant of just about all missing stories, save Power, Highlanders and [regrettably] Invasion.
My dyspraxia's playing up. I'm sure I sent you a heap of missing stories... maybe it was Miles?
Still, I can get them for you if you want. Well, audios of them.
Of course.
Though I'm prioritising finishing my Sharpe collection first, you understand.
Fair enough. You'd have to fork out for a box set, too.
The damned ABC store didn't have Sharpe's Gold though! That's the one Nigel Kneale wrote, despite having complete contempt for history, so Sharpe saves women from Aztec cultists in the middle of Spain!
*starts to laugh, then frowns as realization dawns you're not joking*
Bernard Cornwell, the creator, says that his jaw-dropped when he watched it. I HAVE to see it, ABC, I NEED TO SEE THE AWFULNESS!!!
I thought The Next Life would have sated such instincts for a few minutes...
Thanks to the Brig, methinks.
Yes. Strangely enough, when the Brig stops filling in paperwork in an amazingly shit-looking helicopter set and DOES STUFF, the story improves. Who'd have thought it?
Absolutely unarguable classic moment: "GET OFF MY WORLD!" *psychotic gunfire*
For once, the Brig gets to kill the alien menace! Yay!
..but then it's immediately spoilt by the amazingly crap 'death' scene. The Doctor's meant to be displaying heart-broken remorse, but my whole family pissed ourselves laughing at his delivery. And Nick seemed to be playing it for laughs as well...
Ironic, as it was redone five hundred times. DWM needed extra pages to cover the plot changes...
THAT was the best he could do?
And THIS was the guy they wanted to script-edit the next season? Sometimes the mind really does boggle..
Why give the old woman the power of sight... then remove the character from the plot? If, say, her sight was somehow part of the plot resolution, it'd help.
It would help if ANY of the villagers were important..
I note that the rest of the season acts like Planet didn't happen, none of the cliffhangers lead into it or anything.
That's a very, VERY good point. I just remembered that I expected some sort of throw-away "Well, erm, it's good that the old girl is back at her normal size, hmm? No more giant wasps, ahaha, yes.." but it never came.
My dyspraxia's playing up. I'm sure I sent you a heap of missing stories... maybe it was Miles?
Must have been. You've given me a heap of Colins, various BFs, Darkness Falls, The Nightmare Fair, and something called "Beyond the Vortex" that takes up a lot of discs..
Still, I can get them for you if you want. Well, audios of them.
It'd be good to get around to eventually.. but I think I'm right for the moment.
*starts to laugh, then frowns as realization dawns you're not joking*
Fun Trivia Fact: Did you know Nigel Kneale also wrote one of the 'Halloween' movies - the only film in the series NOT to feature an insane slasher serial company, but instead has a toy company making toys with evil murdering tendancies.
I thought The Next Life would have sated such instincts for a few minutes...
For the moment...
Yes. Strangely enough, when the Brig stops filling in paperwork in an amazingly shit-looking helicopter set and DOES STUFF, the story improves. Who'd have thought it?
Is it wrong of me to want a world where CD's spoof was genuine, and the last site of the Brigadier was machine gunning a demon growling, "I am too old for this shit!"?
Absolutely unarguable classic moment: "GET OFF MY WORLD!" *psychotic gunfire*
For once, the Brig gets to kill the alien menace! Yay!
Truly great. One of the few things stopping me taping over it.
..but then it's immediately spoilt by the amazingly crap 'death' scene. The Doctor's meant to be displaying heart-broken remorse, but my whole family pissed ourselves laughing at his delivery. And Nick seemed to be playing it for laughs as well...
Yeah. I think Sylv (who seemed to be having a bad day) went, "Why play it serious if it's just going to be a gag?" and I only survived watching it by assuming the Doctor's ridiculous melodrama was a 'Captain Jack Face of Boe' wind up...
THAT was the best he could do?
Sadly. Why they left out all the cool stuff with Morgaine stealing locks of hair, I dunno.
And THIS was the guy they wanted to script-edit the next season?
No. They wanted Colin Brake to do that. Aaronovitch was a last resort.
Sometimes the mind really does boggle..
I assume they hadn't seen Battlefield and were working on Remembrance as his level of quality...
It would help if ANY of the villagers were important..
I still don't know if Warmsley is SUPPOSED to be funny or if he's insane or if he's stupid...
That's a very, VERY good point. I just remembered that I expected some sort of throw-away "Well, erm, it's good that the old girl is back at her normal size, hmm? No more giant wasps, ahaha, yes.." but it never came.
Nope. Really wierd, but they NEVER mentioned it again, and Hartnell era had more continuity references than anything pre Season 21...
Must have been. You've given me a heap of Colins, various BFs, Darkness Falls, The Nightmare Fair, and something called "Beyond the Vortex" that takes up a lot of discs..
Oh... Those I burned for myself and just added them to the pile. They're little docos about the Eighth Doctor stories... Sorry.
It'd be good to get around to eventually.. but I think I'm right for the moment.
Yeah. How many stories do you have left to listen to?
Fun Trivia Fact: Did you know Nigel Kneale also wrote one of the 'Halloween' movies - the only film in the series NOT to feature an insane slasher serial company, but instead has a toy company making toys with evil murdering tendancies.
I did not know that. But I get Halloween, Friday 13th and Nightmare on Elm street mixed up quite a bit... Kneale wasn't good at working in formula, was he?
For the moment...
I know the feeling.
No. They wanted Colin Brake to do that. Aaronovitch was a last resort.
A similar setup to the B7 revival, then?
I assume they hadn't seen Battlefield and were working on Remembrance as his level of quality...
Again, similar to the B7 revival..
Oh... Those I burned for myself and just added them to the pile. They're little docos about the Eighth Doctor stories... Sorry.
..oh.
Yeah. How many stories do you have left to listen to?
Hmm... well... I've got half of Her Final Flight.. I think at least one more Colin story.. Darkness Falls and Nightmare Fair.. Colditz (listening now), Omega, and Spare Parts.
It's really, really weird hearing Tennant playing a Nazi. I thought he'd have a completely different voice, but he sounds disturbingly similar to the Doctor...
I did not know that. But I get Halloween, Friday 13th and Nightmare on Elm street mixed up quite a bit... Kneale wasn't good at working in formula, was he?
No. It's been noted that he had a distinct lack of respect for other people's work.
I wonder what it'd have been like if he wrote a DW story?
A similar setup to the B7 revival, then?
Well, even the most generous of people would note Ben didn't have any experience as a script editor.
Again, similar to the B7 revival..
Except I do start to think Ben was trying to sabotage it.
..oh.
Eighth Doctor Confidential, you might say.
Hmm... well... I've got half of Her Final Flight.. I think at least one more Colin story.. Darkness Falls and Nightmare Fair.. Colditz (listening now), Omega, and Spare Parts.
Well, if you get desperate you can always relisten to Scherzo...
It's really, really weird hearing Tennant playing a Nazi. I thought he'd have a completely different voice, but he sounds disturbingly similar to the Doctor...
I could cope until he tried to rape Ace... just somewhere my subconscious didn't want to go.
You haven't heard him as Luther Arkright, the time travelling Cassonova who travels with a girl called Rose and fights the evil Paul Darrow between being killed and regenerating. Or as Galanar, the non-Cockney Tenth Doctor.
I swear to God, it's hard to find a role where he DOESN'T seem to be playing the Doctor...
No. It's been noted that he had a distinct lack of respect for other people's work.
I wonder what it'd have been like if he wrote a DW story?
Well, if he didn't respect Napoleonic Warfare Drama, is he going to respect the people that repeatedly ripped off every last plot idea he EVER came up with? And then took the piss out of this with a Quatermass gag by, of all people, Ben Aaronovitch?
We'd probably end up with something like The Natural History of Fear...
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